All Apologies: July Edition

25 Jul

Happy Monday? It definitely feels like a Monday but at least I got an early start on stuff today. I decided to break out another edition of All Apologies. I haven’t posted one since the initial one back in May and have gotten some let’s just say interesting search results that have brought people to my blog in the past month. Once again, to those who have been directed over here in search of one of these terms-I’m sorry I couldn’t help you. Some of my favorites are below (with my comments in red):

shaka wear plaid-I’m more of a polka dot kinda gal, never was a prep plus plaid does nothing to shrink the appearance of my booty.

splenda addiction –I know, I know. I’m well aware that I have one and I tend to swipe them as well. You can’t take me anywhere.

kucher’shka-hmmm no clue

cute qdoba boy- Someone better not be mackin on my forbidden fruit of a qdoba boy back in Charlotte!

athenos greek yogurt commercial actress johanna-I’ve never seen an Athenos greek yogurt commercial. And I’m kind of pissed off at their company because they won’t offer any coupons online plus they blatantly tell you online if you try to write them, they still won’t send you coupons. That just leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

funky hippie kitchens-I wanna go to one!

how healthy is catfish

pics of whipping table- Sorry, cannot help you

cool whip covered breasts—heeeeeeey-ooo!

Girls act weird uptown-

Sunnu Neyal Porn-I had to laugh at this because naturally, I thought of Neyal. Then I wondered what kind of funky porn Sunnu Neyal does.

Harris Teeter dragon

Cute Starbucks barista-I haven’t seen too many cute male ones. All the attractive male ones seem to be too pretty and of course, like the men.

Making shrooms to get high- Can’t help you

Greek god of sex-I am not sure but I think I shall research

leonardo dicaprio touch me there fotos-SAY WHAAAAAAA????!!!!

Scottish breakfast burrito-I’ve never had Scottish food so I’m not sure what this would entail but color me intrigued.

ryan gosling crazy stupid love workout

sexy thai girls drinking pomegranate juice

paula deen excited-you mean her riding men like horses? I would be excited too!

moody bloated tired-Ouch.

what were bad things about shaka-See above

i have a red welp on my are what kind of bite is it-I had one last summer and it was nasty. I’m still not sure what happened or if I reacted negatively to something I ate or put on my face but fear not, it went away

since i ganna go to over there today starboucks-holla?

what is taylor swifts favorite condiment-I don’t know and I don’t care for that evil bunny

be my hippie-OMG, is this like be my valentine??

hung men in speedos

ex con licking-I think I may have a story about that

leonardo dicaprio con nutella – screw peanut butter cups-this is the new combination! What is Leo up to these days anyways? A lot of people seem to be searching for info on him but I can’t think of if I’ve seen him in any movie previews as of late.

living with amy bacon wrapped tater tots-Maybe Amy’s roommate googled this to make for Amy’s  birthday today?

julius peppers naked-I’ve never seen him naked but there has to be a better site to find nude pictures of him than my blog

tina turner speaks vietnamese-This made me laugh because I thought of Meet The Parents “jack talk Thai. Jack talk Thai very well”

ex boyfriend from college 12 years ago- that would be my ex boyfriend who wore a red suit to our formal to match my red dress. It was either that or a purple suit and I figured he would look less like a King of Comedy if he were wearing red and a white, Polish dude.

(source)

RIP Bernie

green monster purple nipple-do you know how tempted I am to make two slushy green monsters and place purple skittles right in the middle to resemble nips?

If you have a blog, what’s the most interesting search result you’ve had recently?

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19 Responses to “All Apologies: July Edition”

  1. Amy @ Second City Randomness July 25, 2011 at 9:44 am #

    A whipping table?

    Wow. My mind just went straight to the gutter.

    • OliePants July 26, 2011 at 1:16 pm #

      I have to ditto this – I was going to comment the exact thing and then Amy came along!

    • simplyshaka July 26, 2011 at 11:00 pm #

      I know, right? I have an idea of what it is but don’t want to google it because I fear that I will be correct.

  2. agirlandhermutt July 25, 2011 at 10:11 am #

    HA! Those are hysterical. Althought I’m not sure what it says about you either that your blog is linked to these things. Dirty dirty girl.

    • simplyshaka July 26, 2011 at 10:59 pm #

      Yes I am 🙂 Apparently, it’s no longer a secret!

  3. Carly July 25, 2011 at 11:55 am #

    I found “where to buy sugar cane sticks in memphis” particularly interesting in my search terms. Sorry readers, no clue.

  4. Jessica @ Stylish Stealthy and Healthy July 25, 2011 at 1:51 pm #

    The search terms are easily reward enough for starting a blog. And for the record I don’t like that evil little bunny either.

  5. BikiniBy30 July 25, 2011 at 3:35 pm #

    I can’t remember,have I asked you if you’ve heard the sing Taylor, the Latte Boy?

    • simplyshaka July 26, 2011 at 10:58 pm #

      I havent it and now LOVE it–thanks for sharing!

  6. Alex July 25, 2011 at 5:32 pm #

    Ha! I love this post. The search engine terms always crack me up .

    A couple recent ones of mine: ‘why does gordon ramsay change his shirt,’ ‘everythingin ass,’ and ‘israeli women.’

  7. Natalie @Will Jog For Food July 25, 2011 at 7:10 pm #

    I had a “mojitos in bed” search. Is that a new term i don’t know about? hehe

    • simplyshaka July 26, 2011 at 10:49 pm #

      Kinky, I want to a mojito in bed. I wonder if it’s served by a cabana boy??

  8. Ashleigh July 26, 2011 at 11:39 am #

    I haven’t gotten any real weird ones lately.I must admit even though I do have a blog for everyone to see… its not very popular and i haven;’t shared it with many friends or fam so I always wonder who is directly searching for ashleigh’s slice, ya know?!

  9. diana@mymarblerye July 26, 2011 at 11:50 am #

    LOL that’s what you get for being pervy and outspoken!! My dirtiest one is penis tattoo…not as bad…

  10. Katie @ Legally Fit July 26, 2011 at 11:53 am #

    The search terms are too funny- seriously, what are some people looking for? So weird and hilarious.

  11. Alyssa @ Life of bLyss July 26, 2011 at 12:32 pm #

    well, you know, I always come over to your blog for leonardo dicaprio touch me there photos.

    and your plentiful cool whip covered breasts pictures. I can’t get enough.

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