The World According to Lincoln

Arf Arf, this is Lincoln.

My momma still isn’t feeling well so I am going to write about today.

She fell asleep while watching Food Network. I was going in and out of sleep but I could still hear the tv on. First there was this loud, annoying brunette who kept saying things like “Yumm-o” and “E.V.O.O.” I have no clue what either of those mean. Next there was this couple making comfort food and couldn’t keep their hands off each other, I was a bit put off by this. The last show I remember was a southern woman with big hair making things with a lot of butter, I liked her and her food looked good.

My momma got up and decided to switch it up to the bedroom so we napped there for a while. She kept tossing and turning and so did I but eventually I had a dream about the cute Maltese I met yesterday who lives across the street from us. Her name is Sprinkles, she is cute and voluptuous. Momma got frustrated after a while with not being able to fall asleep so she got up to make something to eat. I don’t think she was too hungry but she needed something in her system so she made something she calls a green monster.

She broke out the blender and threw in some baby spinach, greek yogurt, ice, frozen blueberries, a banana and vanilla protein powder and blended for a long while. It was really noisy but it came out pretty and purple.

It must have been good b/c she slurped it up but I think she got a headache from drinking it too fast. We went back to the living room to watch tv and nap. She fell asleep to some show about wedding dresses but I really wish she would leave Animal Planet on if she is going to go to sleep so I can see some cute bitches. I’m stuck in this place all day and get to see some cuties when I go outside to do my thing but I like seeing bitches from other regions as well. Just like Ludacris, I want to have ho’s in different area codes. Throw a dog a bone!

This is my food, Chef Michael’s Rotisserie Chicken Flavor. I love this stuff–I think they lace it with doggie crack. I don’t really get too hungry during the day and am a night eater when momma is getting a good nights rest so she can rock it at work and pay for the both of us to live. And there’s always a lot of water, I need to stay hydrated!

We really didn’t do too much this afternoon, we went for a long walk before the rain started coming down and then just watched tv and cuddled, it was nice. She was watching this show called DC Cupcakes, about Georgetown Cupcake in DC, she was excited to watch the show because went there back in April and really enjoyed the cupcakes (but she kept saying that she liked Crumbs better).

Soon it was dinner time, momma bought some shrimp this morning along with stir fry vegetables such as mushrooms, zucchini and onion for a healthy, cheap meal.

I think she really enjoyed this she kept rubbing her belly and “Mmmmmm-ing” while eating it. She kept reaching for her water though so I think it was a tad too salty for her but she seemed satisfied afterwards. I hope we have more snuggle time later, her head hurts so I am sure that will be on the agenda!

Woof woof!