Once, Twice, Three times not a lady

25 May

Sing it Lionel! Unfortunately, I am not a lady. I cuss, drink beer from a bottle (which my sister lovingly calls me a redneck because of this) and I am crass. I can’t help it. I will never be an elegant lady and am cool with that.

On the bus this morning there was this super hot dude driving next to us the whole way. Naturally I kept staring at him since he had his windows down and was jamming to his music and I can easily appreciate beauty. He finally moved up ahead of us in traffic and I saw the huge rainbow sticker on his car. Talk about a fail.

I had an AMAZING breakfast this morning. During the work week, I usually have oats or greek yogurt as you know but decided to kick it up a notch today! I had a sweet potato and egg-white wrap. I had half a sweet potato left over from dinner last night and sprinkled some paprika on the egg whites before nuking for a minute and a half in the break room

Fabulous! And it kept me full for the entire morning so even better in my book. I would have never tried this combo but saw it on many blogs out there and decided it couldn’t be half bad. Overnight oats on the other hand, blech, no thank you.

I got my a** handed to me at work today. It was super busy, issues galore and  didn’t even get a minute to track my food for the day or catch up on news. However, I saw that the hippies were out  which made me happy.

All that for seven bones—not bad at all

Enter unlady like instance of the day:

I was on the phone with a co-worker in Delaware catching up since I haven’t talked to him. I was multi-tasking with emails, work, etc. I got an email with a lady from UK asking me to “kindly provide the documents requested” and this lady is just a thorn in my side. I then said aloud “Kindly suck my nuts” then realizing I was still on the phone. Crickets. Crickets. Is this thing on?! He was still there and broke out into laughter because he’s never heard me like that. When I’m at work, I am surprisingly professional and not “me” at all.

Once, not a lady.

Lunch was nothing special-just a huge roast beef and pepperjack sandwich on whole wheat with tomato and spinach

Nothing really interesting happened this afternoon other than Stinkalicious is off for the next week and a half!!! Woo Hoo—no annoying voice, no funky smells and just peace. So happy. And one of the new girls on my team is now on Team Anti-Stink so she has my back. Stinkalicious was saying bye to everyone and being very dramatic about it and she just sent me an IM with an eyes rolling emoticon. Love it!

On the bus ride home, I was sitting with my legs kinda open and lounging with my chair tilted back a bit. We were in traffic yet again and looked over to my left to see the car next to us with a teenage boy looking at me all weird. Oh yeah, didn’t mention I was in a skirt huh?

Twice, not a lady

I got home and Lincoln was super happy to see me. Whenever I get home from work, he freaks the eff out–running in circles, hyperventilating, assaulting my face with kisses, you get the picture. We had a nice walk although it was a little soggy on the ground with the on and off rain we’ve been having. These two cute boys were on their second floor balcony and said hi and was watching me and Lincoln but not talking (because that isn’t awkward at all) and I slipped and fell in the mud. Oh, still in a skirt and all. And did I have shorts on under? Hell no, so I mooned the strangers with my Ed Hardy-esque undies.

Three times, not a lady

I didn’t have any plans for dinner but had chicken defrosting in the fridge and decided to make Hummus-Feta Chicken Breasts

I butterflied two breasts, seasoned with salt and pepper and spread Athenos Roasted Red Pepper Hummus and topped with feta because it’s betta and baked for 20 minutes at 350 degrees.

While that was cooking, I cooked snap peas, mushrooms and zucchini in extra virgin olive oil with pepper, paprika and garlic salt

My after dinner snack was a bowl of sliced yellow apple and peach

I’m finally getting around to watching No Impact Man tonight and am excited to watch it!

15 Responses to “Once, Twice, Three times not a lady”

  1. dianacheung May 25, 2010 at 8:58 pm #

    LOL at least you are honest!! I cuss also..but I don’t show my undies..sorry!

  2. Amy @ Second City Randomness May 25, 2010 at 9:29 pm #

    Hahahaha… my mom often shakes her head at my unlady-like ways.

    I love that you told a coworker to suck your nuts. Because I may have done the same at some point or another. In front of my boss. He laughed at least. Whew…

  3. Tamara @ The Stretch Jean Incident May 25, 2010 at 11:43 pm #

    Ha, this is a great post! I too love cussing and booze. But I also love awesome, healthy food and everything you posted made me hungry and anxious for payday!

    And I’m glad to know I’m not the only gal who tells others to suck my nuts. I say it most when watching Jeopardy or at pub quiz, ’cause I’m an angry nerd like that.

  4. janetha May 25, 2010 at 11:45 pm #

    mmmmmmmmmmmmm that chicken looks TO. DIE. FOR. love the unladylike references.

  5. genesis May 26, 2010 at 12:27 am #

    you’re my long lost twin! where have you been all my life. this post sounds exactly like something i would do. sometimes when im talking to my hubby on the phone at work the ‘me’ comes out and i have to look around to make sure no one heard…lol.

  6. terri May 26, 2010 at 7:42 am #

    too funny! all your food looks simply delish! enjoy your wednesday. the week is almost 1/2 way done! whoop!

  7. Kelly May 26, 2010 at 11:25 am #

    I definitely have a BAD potty mouth!

  8. Monique May 26, 2010 at 11:46 am #

    LOL! we are definitely kindred.
    I am not a lady. On my first date with eharmony guy last week he asked me what I look for in a partner. Instead of being all shy and innocent I started to say what I was looking for in a man and then closed it with “You know, all taht gay stuff”. To my relief he laughed and i watned to die. Why do i say shit like this? I would totally say suck my nuts… but i like balls better. Kindly suck my balls. LOL
    balls. LOL!
    sorry! im 12 again.
    I dont do skirts becuase my knees do not like eachother. they sit as far apart as they can from one another.
    you should totally nuke the tater next time, dice it up throw it in your egg whites and then put it in the oven like i told you yesterday. and maybe add a lil cheese. HEEAAAAVENLY!

  9. kace @ no guts no glory May 26, 2010 at 12:54 pm #

    Where’s the fun in being a lady? Boo to that.

  10. pen May 26, 2010 at 1:02 pm #

    LOLZ! You made me laugh out loud…and this totally sounds like my life. I curse like a sailor. And, honestly, I don’t want to change it. It just wouldn’t be the same life without dropping a F-bomb every 10 minutes. :)

  11. Karla May 26, 2010 at 1:50 pm #

    Drinking beer from a bottle is not lady like? I call it practical. Why dirty a glass when you have a perfectly good bottle?

  12. emily May 26, 2010 at 2:08 pm #

    Movie review please??

    I too am soooo not a lady. Sometimes my husband calls me his delicate flower and then laughs hysterically!

  13. christina May 26, 2010 at 4:29 pm #

    very nice job w/ the chicken!! never had hummus baked in my chicken before…or baked at all. sounds interesting! i have a potty mouth too and LOVE DRINKING BEER FROM THE BOTTLE !! duh! i’m so classy — coor’s light is my fave.

  14. Jenna May 26, 2010 at 6:36 pm #

    Roast beef and pepperjack sounds PRetty special to me…YUM!!

  15. nic - the auspicious squirrel May 28, 2010 at 11:12 pm #

    Just call me sailor mouth, haha :D

    Those veggies look good… paprika, nice touch. :)

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